I didn’t know how to be a good Christian
Story of a growing Cristian
I have spent more of my life being Christian than not, yet, I had very little idea of how to do it right. I remained stagnant in my Christianity for most of the years; moreover, I took a few steps back at one point. Somewhere in my mind, I reasoned that I needed only to obey the ten commandments and go to church. Though both are commendable and essential to being a Christian, on their own, they could never propel me to the dimension I aspire to achieve in my Christian journey.
It was not until recently that I made a pivotal discovery. Turns out that if I want to grow in Christ, I need to pray and study the Bible. I know, shocker! That might seem quite obvious to some of you, yet I remained in denial about the terms and conditions of my faith. “I hear the word of the word of God when I go to church; that should be enough, and I pray (occasionally.)”
In the trenches of my mind, I convinced myself that I didn’t want to be too Christian. I did not want to jump, scream, and shout like the others did. Pardon my ignorance; I was young and didn’t quite grasp Psalm 100:1, “Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.”
Since then, God rewired my brain network and added sense, allowing me to join a church dripping in His anointing and connecting me to mentors who are guiding me in my growth. I have been yearning to be a better ambassador of Christ and be like those same people who are not ashamed of jumping, screaming, and shouting for God.
In order to satisfy my newfound desire, prayer had to make more frequent appearances in my life as my typical 'jump out of bed and say something to God that I could not recall if you asked me five minutes after' was not going to cut it. My mind tended to simultaneously decide on my breakfast, create a to-do list, and reflect on yesterday’s conversations, making morning prayers quite the obstacle. After a grand 45 seconds mental battle, I would reassure myself that I didn’t need to be good at praying. God understands.
Similarly, my nightly prayers were deprived of sincerity. After binging a few episodes of Grey’s Anatomy, a whisper directed to God would flow from my lips as my sheets climbed up my shoulders. It goes something like this, “Lord, thank you for today, bless my family, protect us as we sleep, give us the strength to go on, in Jesus' name.” On the surface, this is a decent prayer. However, in Ephesians 6:18, Paul tells us to “Pray in the Spirit…” and my spirit was at the intersection of dreamland and sleepville.
A lesson from my spiritual leader and critical self-assessment led me to a powerful question “If God gave me 24 hours in a day, and on top of that, helped me complete my tasks and provided a place for me to rest and binge-watch medical drama, is He not deserving of more than my washed- up prayer?” He is more deserving than anything I could offer Him. Still, I had to do better. I have been doing better by being more prayerful and intentional with my prayers. I do not always know what to pray about, but asking God to teach me how to pray helps. See here for a poem asking God to teach me how to pray.
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)
The Youversion Bible app that I use tracks my Bible reading streak recorded 248 days as my longest streak, which I proudly took a screenshot of to post on my story. Despite reading a verse daily for over 200 consecutive days, there was only microscopic growth in my knowledge and understanding of the Bible.
Reading the word of God is great, but studying it, feasting on it, and applying it to daily life is like snuggling in a warm blanket on a cold, rainy day. I have come to acknowledge and accept that the Bible is the roadmap for my life, and I must read it to know where to go and how to get there.
All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works. 2 Tim 3:16-17 (NKJV)
If you too desire to grow as a Christian (which I 10/10 recommend), try being more prayerful and studying the Bible. There is a whole new dimension for your to experience, not to mention how you will feel far more equipped to overcome your challenges.
Comment below: Talk about your experience moving from stagnancy to growth in the Lord.